Stoic Psychological Terms and Techniques.
Grief
"Let your tears flow, but let them also cease, let deepest sighs be drawn from your breast, but let them also find an end." -Seneca. Engage in retrospective negative visualization and be of gratitude and the grief will cease. Feign gloomy emotions if necessary, but inwardly do not let them take root.
Epictetus's Dichotomy
"Some things are up to us and some things are not up to us." -Epictetus. Consider Dr. William Irvine's interpretation of Epictetus's Dichotomy stands as a trichotomy. 1.) Things we have complete control over, (Goals, virtues, and attitude). 2.) Things which we have no control over at all. (Sun rise). 3.) Things over which we have some but not complete control (Tennis match).
Fatalism
According to Marcus Aurelius, a good man will welcome, "every experience the looms of fate may weave for him." Stoics are utterly against dwelling on the past, "If only..." thoughts are emotionally taxing and worthless. A stoic peers into the past to learn and for retrospective projective visualization. The stoics argue that the best way to gain satisfaction is not by working to satisfy whatever desires we find within us but by learning to be satisfied with our life how it is-by learning to be happy with whatever we've got. We can spend our days wishing for circumstances were different, but if we allow ourselves to do this, we will spend our days in a state of dissatisfaction. We can either spend this moment wishing it could be different, or we can embrace this moment. If we habitually do the former, we will spend much of our life in a state of dissatisfaction; if we habitually do the latter, we will enjoy our life. "Live in this fleeting instant" -Marcus Aurelius.
Anger
Being angry is a waste of precious time. We live in a world were there there is much to be angry about. Unless you can control your anger, you will be perpetually angry. One possible route to avoid wasting time on anger is to look at ones situation in a humorous light. Laugh, frequently and wholly at would otherwise make you angry. Also, one should ponder the impermanence of the world around us. Many of the things we thing are important in fact aren't. at least in the grand scheme of things. If we are overly sensitive, we are quick to make foolish emotional outbursts like anger. More generally Seneca says, if we coddle ourselves, if we allow ourselves to be corrupted by pleasure, nothing will seem bearable . Not because things are hard, but because we are soft. Seneca therefore recommends that we take steps to ensure that we never get too comfortable. Voluntary discomfort is done to increase joy and appreciation of life. This is not self-inflicted masochism, rather it is voluntary perspective shifting. "Punishment is an expression not of anger but of caution." -Seneca.
Pursuit of Wealth
Besides fame, people typically value wealth. Epictetus asserts that not needing wealth is more valuable than wealth itself. People always needing to refine their luxuries are in a vicious cycle of never having enough, reference hedonic adaptation. Rather than living to eat-Rather than spending our life pursuing the pleasure to be derived from food-We should live to eat. Luxury, Seneca warns, uses her wit to promote vices. First she makes us want things that are inessential, then she makes us want things that are injurious. Before long, the mind becomes slave to the body's whims and pleasures. Do not pursue wealth under the guise you will be gaining happiness. "The fish in the water that is thirsty needs serious professional counseling." -Kabir
Counter Insults
Cato was pleading a case when an adversary named Lentulus spit in his face. Rather than getting angry or returning the insult, Cato calmly wiped off the spit and said, "I will swear to anyone, Lentulus, that people are wrong to say that you cannot use your mouth!" Socrates was boxed in the ear without warning. Rather than getting angry, Socrates made a joke about what a nuisance it is, when we go out, that we can never be sure whether or not to wear a helmet. One may always use self-deprecating humor. & Absolute silence as if indifferent to the insulter.
Projective Visualization
Epictetus says that projective visualization can be used to evaluate our reactions. Example: Say that a servant breaks a cup at your banquet. Initially, you may be hot tempered with the servant and act in an agitated manner. Take a step back, realize that if you were a guest at this banquet you would feel less esteem for the host for acting angry, or irritated with the servant when it was a mere accident. Likewise, think of how people may react in road rage or other difficulties. Can one not be sophisticated enough to commit to projective visualization and see the right behavior to exhibit? This will avert a potential circumstance from inhibiting tranquility.
Dichotomy of Control
Epictetus's Handbook opens "Some things are up to us and somethings are not up to us." This technique is useful for centering our focus on what is actually ambulatory. Epictetus says we can control how much effort we put forth, but we can not control many other outer variables that may challenge us. Many things in life we have some control on. It does one no good to hold anxiety or tension over an outcome when all they can control is the input. Focus your energy on your internal goals.
Fear (of failure)
It is better, failure averse people reason, not to attempt an undertaking than to run the risk of public humiliation. Realize too, many other people, perhaps even your friends and relatives, want you to fail in your undertakings. They may be silently rooting against you as your success may make them feel insecure and uncomfortable. Consequently, if you attempt something daring they might ridicule you, predict disaster, and try to talk you out of pursuing your goal. It is of course possible to win the approval of naysayers. You would need to abandon your dreams. If done, naysayers will recognize you as a kindred spirit and will approve of you. Thus inviting you to come and mock others who pursue their dreams despite the possibility of failure. Is that the company you want to keep? Above all, learn to ignore naysayers. Indifference to public opinion should be wrought with self-confidence.
Dealing with non-philosophers
It is permissible and sometimes necessary for us to socialize with non-philosophers. These are individuals who do not share our stoic values. When we do associate with these people, we must take care that they do not influence us or contaminate our thinking.
Insults
Many people tend to be overly sensitive to insults. Perhaps we may be made the butt of a joke, "Please put on a hat, the sunlight reflecting off of your bald head is blinding me." Or perhaps backhanded compliments: "That outfit hides your bulges." Or people may slight us by taking credit we deserve or failing to accredit us. A stoic realizes that insults are inevitable. He is wise in his manner of interpreting them such that there is no self imposed "sting". -Consider whether what the insulter said or did is rightful or truthful. -Pause to reflect how well informed the insulter is. -Consider if the insult can be taken as constructive criticism. -If it is from someone you do not wan't to be like, it may actually be a compliment. -Remember that the sting of an insult is simply your judgement of it.
Pursuit of fame
People are unhappy in a large part because they are confused about what is valuable. Stoics are to be indifferent to others opinions, but should conceal their indifference if necessary. We should ignore what other people think of us. For most people, this is difficult advice as it goes against social proof tendency. We may work hard, first to win the admiration of other people and then to avoid loosing it. To win the admiration of other people we may need to conform to their values. To impress others we will need to live a successful life in their view of what a successful life is. Cato consciously did things to trigger the disdain of other people simply so he could practice ignoring their disdain.
Self Denial
Seneca advocates that instead of merely thinking about what it would be like to lose our wealth, we should periodically "practice poverty": We should content ourselves with "the scantiest and cheapest fare" and with "coarse and rough dress." Seneca and Epicurus are much alike in this respect. Epicurus, a philosophical rival to the Stoics, also practiced poverty. His goal in doing so, however, appears to have been different from that of Seneca. Whereas Seneca wanted to appreciate what he had, Epicurus wanted to examine the things he thought he needed so he could determine what he could live without. They realized that in many cases, we work hard to obtain things we don't need and that don't bring any satisfaction. Self denial also makes one tougher and more mentally apt to deal with life's blessings.
Hedonic adaption
Shane Frederick and George Loewenstein discovered this psychological phenomenon. "We humans are unhappy in a large part because we are insatiable; after working hard to get what we want, we routinely lose interest in the object of our desire. Rather than feeling satisfied, we feel a bit bored, and in response to this boredom, we go on to form new, even grader desires. For instance this is a predictable pattern in Lottery winners. Winning a lottery typically allows someone to live the life of there dreams, for a little while at least. it turns out, though, that after the initial period of exhilaration, lottery winners end up about as happy as they previously were. They start taking their new Ferrari and mansion for granted, the way they previously took their rusted-out pickup and cramped apartment for granted." "Another, less dramatic example of hedonic adaption occurs when we make consumer purchases. Initially we feel delight in the wider-screen television or fine leather handbag we bought. After a time, though, we come to despise them and find ourselves longing for an even wider-screen television or a more extravagant handbag. Aside from possessions, we experience hedonic adaption in our career, and relationships. One should employ premeditatio malorum to ensure hedonic adaptation is powerless over him.
Stoic goal setting
Stoics are noted for having aversion to setting any goal that is not internally attainable. Their goal is not to change the world, but to do their best to bring about certain changes. Even if there efforts are not successful, they can rest in peace knowing they accomplished their goal. A practicing stoic will keep the dichotomy of control firmly in mind as he goes through his daily affairs. Having goals that are internally achievable only, will set aside a great deal of needless anxiety. In saying so, your goal should never to be a certain outcome, but a certain behavior and focus that is conducive to a certain outcome. Be cautious of crossing this thin line, one side will make a man clench his jaw and conjure useless anxieties while the other man will remain focused and have an attitude worth reward.
Cynicism at a glance
The Cynics were known for their wisdom and wit, I.E. "Its better to fall with crows than with flatterers; for in the one case you are devoured when dead, in the other case while alive." & "Pay attention to your enemies, for they are the first to discover your faults." -Antisthenes. Cynics were ascetics, the ancient equivalent of homeless; they lived on the street and slept on the ground. They owned but one poor cloak, theirs was a day-to-day, hand-to-mouth existence. Diogenes of Sinope was a student of Antisthenes. Diogenes says that hunger is the best appetizer, and he who waits to eat until he is hungry or to drink when he is thirsty derives much more satisfaction in life. In this light, Diogenes argued that one could derive more satisfaction from eating a barley cake than one could achieve from eating the finest foods. Just as he enjoyed a drink from the running water more than others did their Thasian wine. "Bad men obey their lusts as servants obey their masters," and because they cannot control their desires, they cannot find contentment. -Diogenes of Sinope
Negative Visualization.
The Romans called it, premeditatio malorum. Negative Visualization teaches us to embrace whatever life we happen to be living and to extract every bit of delight we can from it. It simultaneously teaches us to accept that we may be without the things we enjoy. It teaches, in other word, to enjoy what we have without clinging to it. "Misfortune weighs most heavy on those who expect nothing but good fortune." "All things everywhere are perishable." -Epictetus. Negative visualization allows us to negate thoughts of hedonic adaption.