Parenting Chapter 1-2

Self-Esteem of Children in Different Ethnic Groups

* Self-esteem scores reflect a variety of factors and do not mirror society's positive/negative view of group; they reflect: - Group's focus on individualistic goals and willingness to make positive self- statements - Length of time in US as people come to resemble American behavior of making positive statements - Age - as young children of all groups make positive statements until they take on cultural messages of their group about making positive statements - Support from social movements that emphasize group's achievements and increased presence of other group members in geographic area increase scores - Individuals of high status (high education and good jobs) in all groups resemble each other - Can speculate that one way to increase self-esteem among groups is to increase

Tudge's Study of Three-Year-Olds around the World

* Wanting to understand how social status and national culture operate to provide resources for children, Jonathan Tudge studied 3-yr.-olds in 7 countries * Families were in countries with differing models - independent model (US and Finland), collectivist model (Russia, Estonia, and South Korea) and developing countries (Kenya, Brazil and also South Korea) - in each country, both middle class and working class samples of families, all living in cities of 200,000 were selected

Course covers:

* Ways parents rear children in this country from birth to maturity * How social factors like culture and ethnicity influence what parents do and how children respond * How different forms of family life influence parent-child interactions * How parents' actions stimulate children's growth, buffer children from effects of genetic predispositions, and encourage resilience in the face of adversity

The Third Partner in the Process of Parenting

* We easily identify parents and children but the social context of parenting is less noticeable but at times can be more powerful than parents or children. * As parents provide homes that shelter them and their children, society provides the social atmosphere that surrounds these homes and supports or strains parents' and children's behavior. * Here we discuss our society in general and in the next chapter we look at specific kinds of social influence and how they impact families. * As we will see, society is a changing force and we can modify it if we choose.

Protective Factors

* When children had warm relationships with parents, prosocial friends, and were engaged in school decreased but did not eliminate effects of discrimination * African American mothers who experienced discrimination had increased depression and stress-related physical problems but when they learned sensitive parenting techniques, their moods improved and children's behavior became more compliant

Retaining Elements of Culture of Origin

* When cultures shift to new orientations, it is important to keep some of the ties to their traditional roots * In Canada, links drawn between suicide rates and the ability of Native Canadians to retain traditional control over their land, their community and government services. Those tribes that maintained control had much lower suicide rates than those who did not retain control and a sense of connection with their past

Bicultural identity

* When immigrants or ethnic group members have attachments to majority cultural group as well as their own, they are said to have a bicultural identity

When Parents' Behavior Changes, Children's Behavior Changes

* When mothers became more sensitive, and warmer, children felt less anxious and increased in self-esteem over time * When mothers became more effective disciplinarians, children became more compliant and less impulsive over time * When divorced mothers become more positive with children, set limits more effectively, their children become less depressed, less aggressive, and more friendly and interactive with peers - - mothers' behavior also changes and they become more effective increasing both their educational and occupational levels

Parents Set Children on Path of Development That Can Be Changed

* When parents provide warm, sensitive care, forming secure attachments, as toddlers, their children easily develop self-regulation that enable them to follow rules and make friends in preschool; children develop self-esteem and confidently enter elementary school years where they continue to learn and form friends. * Conversely when mothers of infants are stressed, depressed, less sensitive, stimulating, and positive, children are set on a path of aggressive behaviors that continue through preschool years; in elementary school, they achieve less well academically, have few friends, and feel lonely.

Stimulating Maximal Growth

* When parents stimulate children's interests and encourage learning, children perform more effectively (Chapter 9) * Adoptive, nondepressed parents who provide sensitive parenting reduce likelihood their toddlers will show the behaviors characteristic of children of depressed mothers even though their children have genetic predisposition to develop these behaviors (Chapter 13)

Are Parents Bound to Repeat Childhood Patterns?

* While there may be an increased likelihood that children will follow parents' examples of substance abuse, abuse with children, still the great majority do not follow ion their parents' footsteps * Parents are most successful at avoiding negative behaviors when they are aware of their feelings about parents' behaviors, accept that parents could not give them what they needed * Consciously choose different ways of relating to children

Public's View of Family Changes

* 32% disapprove of all changes as bad for society, 31% say changes are good or unimportant, and 37% say changes make no differences. * Public is most concerned about single mothers having a child without another involved parent and 69% say it is bad for society, most likely because of the hardships for mothers and children. * Only about 42 - 43 % feel it is bad for parents to raise children without marrying or for gay and lesbian parents to raise children.

Current Diversity in Children's Living Arrangements

* 60% live with two married biological/ adoptive parents * 3% live with two cohabiting biological/adoptive parents * 6% live with two parents, one biological/one stepparent married or cohabiting * 21% live with mother alone and 2% with mother cohabiting * 2.4% live with father alone and .6% with father cohabiting * 4% do not live with parents but with grandparents, foster parents

Ethnic Diversity in Today's Families

* 66% of population describe themselves as European American 16% describe themselves as Hispanic * 13% describe themselves as African Americans * 4% describe themselves as Asian Americans * 1% describe themselves as Native Americans * 1.8% describe themselves as being of two or more

Immigrants' Experiences

* About 1 in 4 children in US live in immigrant families - most were born here but have immigrant parent or parents * Acculturation to new culture is process of learning about new culture and deciding how to integrate the new with the old culture - many aspects of culture to pay attention to - language, food, customs, social adaptation

Children's Level of Reasoning

* All programs have to take into account children's level of reasoning * Even children in preschool years understand moral rules of fairness and equal treatment for all, and social inclusion can be presented as a fair rule for everyone, and exclusion, an unfair act

Similarity of Problem Behaviors Reported by Parents in 24 Countries

* Although countries varied in number of problems parents of young children were concerned about (as measured by their responses on the Child Behavior Check List, three problems were reported as concerning in 22 of 24 societies: - Can't stand waiting - Demands must be met immediately - Wants a lot of attention

Common Behaviors

* As we have seen, and will see in Chapter 9, there are commonalities in children's behaviors despite different national values and different emphases on activities * However we do not have the fine-grained analyses of children's behaviors and competencies that can tell us how differing values affect children's growth and development as we saw in study of Canadian, Peruvian, and Indian children

What Can We Do to Help Parents?

* As we will see throughout the text, parents in this country receive few benefits in terms of health care for children, paid family leave from work at birth or times of illness, free early childhood education, readily available quality daycare * What can all of us do in our everyday lives to give parents a helping hand? Offer help on or off subways, buses, from grocery stores. A compliment on their child's behavior?

Since Parents Are So Important Should We Require They Have a License?

* Behavior geneticist David Lykken believes parents are so important in children's lives they should be required to have a license * To get one, he would require that parents be over 18, married, graduated from high school, have a job and no history of violence * They qualifications fit rather well with what bioecological theory says children need: 2 caregiving figures to care for the child and support each others' efforts, a long-term commitment to care for the child, a peaceful home

Italian and American Child Care

* Behaviors of Italian and American mothers illustrate how culture shapes what they do and is passed on to infants * American and Italian mothers were observed at home during babies' first 18 months of life * All members of nuclear families were observed and interviewed in their homes

Historical Time as an Influence on Parenting

* Bengtson describes how economic and social changes affect family structure and parenting. * Families rearing children after WWII, for example, had many supports in buying homes, getting educations for parents. * Historical context of today is one of diminishing economic resources for families because of job losses or cut backs in spending so small businesses fail.

Older Children

* Biggest factor shaping behaviors of older children around the world is the level of industrialization in the country * In industrialized countries, children's major block of time is spent away from parents in school whereas in non-industrialized countries children spend time in work with parents * While Asian children spend most out of school time at home studying, American children spend more out of school time with peers and adults in leisure activities and sports

Child's Contribution to Process

* Child brings sex, temperament, physical condition at birth, experiences during pregnancy (e.g., effects of stress) to the process of parenting * Child provides the love and emotional satisfactions that are most satisfying to adults * Child grows into adult who transmits culture to the next generation and, most importantly, cares for both aging population while rearing the next generation

The Role of the Child

* Child is immature human being who requires care to survive and grow * Requires that that parents meet: * Physical needs for food and shelter * Emotional needs for love and attachment

Tudge's Overall Conclusion

* Children absorb culture from the intersection of their country's values, the values of their social status group, and their own personal interests * Children in all cultures revealed individual differences, some pushing for conversations or work, some wanting lessons * So learning cultural values included these three major influences

Example of Interaction of Three Partners in Increasing Children's Attention Span

* Children bring genetic make-up that may increase likelihood of poor attention span, e.g., DRD4 7-repeat allele * Parents' methods of child rearing when sensitive and warm can decrease likelihood that genetic temperament will lead to poor attention and harsh childrearing can increase likelihood * Nursery school programs emphasizing dramatic play and executive functioning can increase attention span and classroom furniture and rules can increase/decrease attention span * So child, parents, and social context interact to shape children's behavior

Commonalities among Countries

* Children in all countries and social group spent about 60% of their time in play, most often with other children, but what they played with differed - most had toys and books but in Kenya, play was with natural objects like sticks or bottles * Children engaged in work only a small part of the time - 8 to 15% - but others were working around them about 23 to 35% of the time * Children engaged in conversations about 5 to 10% of time with the exception of Finnish children who conversed twice as much as other children * Children engaged in lessons from 5 to 11 % of time with the exception of Finnish and Brazilian children who spent only 2 or 3% of their time in lessons * Children most often initiated play activities but others usually initiated conversations, lessons, and work * In all countries, TV viewing was associated with decreases in time in pretend play and play with educational kinds of materials like books, or toys, and lessons

Methods

* Children were observed by trained observers from those countries for 20 hours in a week in their daily activities that covered the time from waking to going to sleep at night * Four activities were focus: - (1) playing - (2) informal lessons about the way objects and the world work - (3) complex conversations about things occurring in the past or future excluding simpler comments on the present - (4) work

Influence of Poverty Status on Children

* Cognitive delays that appear as early as age 2 and persist to school years leading to learning disabilities and grade retention * Higher levels of neuroendocrine arousal that may underlie health problems and some learning problems * Greater family instability with more moves, separations, more exposure to abuse

Dynamic Nature of Culture

* Culture can shift as living circumstances change; descendants of Japanese who migrated and settled on remote island, had scores on tests of cultural orientation more similar to those of Americans who settled frontiers than Japanese * As countries have become more industrialized and urbanized, they shift to a more independent model

Definition of Culture

* Culture is a system of values, beliefs, ways of thinking, routines, rituals, and institutions established by a group * Group may be large, like a country, or small like a family or a classroom * Culture provides a way of seeing the world, analyzing problems, what we talk about, what we remember

Closeness of Families

* Despite the many changes in forms of family life, children and parents are as attached now as they ever have been. * Nature of activities together may change but closeness among family members remains very similar to what it has been in the past.

Unlikely Brothers

* Discuss how father loss was different in two urban families, one an Irish Catholic family in which father emotionally rejected his son for a number of years, and the other, an African American family in which there were a succession of men involved with mother, but only rarely did one take a paternal role, how each boy became a caring adult in spite of this loss.

Societal Changes continued

* Diverse family forms arose because of social and economic changes in the 1960s and 1970s - the decrease in jobs that supported a family land the rise of the women's movement led to many women leaving the home for paid work; values were becoming more secular and divorces increased as well as more couples living together and having children outside marriage. * Currently, we have multigenerational families that began to increase in the late 1990s and are increasing now where two or three generations live together to save money - - In Chapter 11 we talk about the Accordion family that expands and contracts as needs require.

Independent Model

* Emphasizes importance of the independent individual who defines the self in terms of personal choices, goals and achievements * Social system is a collection of independent individuals striving to achieve goals * Social relationships are mainly interactions to encourage to cooperate with your goals - one feels connected to others as one influences them * Emphasis on self and achievement encourages analysis of situations into parts and logical strategies to achieve goals

Interdependent/Collectivist Model

* Emphasizes importance of the social group * Self is defined by membership in the social system, especially the family and the community, e.g., being a son or daughter * Independent self does not exist apart from group * Group seeks harmony, and individual's role is to understand others' needs and adjust to them so group carries out responsibilities

Ethnic Groups

* Ethnicity refers to "an individual's membership in a group sharing a common ancestral heritage based on nationality, language, and culture" * Psychological attachment to the group is described as "ethnic identity" Most racial groups are now described as ethnic groups

Parents' Tasks in Dealing with Discrimination

* Many children fear exclusion because of race, or ethnic group - Of 15 to 17 year-olds, percentages reporting very big concerns about discrimination were: - 15% of European American - 23 % of African Americans - 37% of Latinos/as * Of 13 and 14 year olds, 32% (not broken down by ethnic group) reported very big concerns about discrimination * Feeling discriminated against by racial slurs or insults, physical threats and false accusations related to increases in depressed feelings and aggressive conduct problems

Why Take Such a Course?

* May be most important class you take in college * Between 65 and 80 percent of people state their major source of satisfaction and meaning in life comes from their relationships with children and families * This class gives you information about maximizing the joys in these relationships, preventing some problems and handling those problems that do occur * Also provides information for the conscientious voter as many social issues and laws revolve around family and parenting issues

Economic Diversity in Today's Families

* Median family income in 2008 was $63,300. * Wide spread of income in relation to ethnic background with a range of median income from $80.000 for Asian American families to $42,000 for African American families. * Top 5% of households have incomes 9 times the income of the lowest 20%. * US is among the unequal countries in the industrialized world along with England, Wales.

Parents' As Advocates for Children's Optimal Growth

* Parents have served as advocates for children with special needs, changing society's views and insisting on accommodations that enable children to become more fully integrated in society * Parents of children who develop outstanding talent have worked hard to see their children get lessons, opportunities for advanced instruction and expert coaching, and though children are not gifted in the beginning, they develop outstanding talent as a result of interest and hard work over a decade's time.* Stories of many Olympic athletes illustrate these points as well. *Additional reference: Benjamin Bloom, Developing Talent in Young People (New York: Ballantine, 1985).

Do Parents Get the Rewards They Deserve?

* Parents invest time, physical and emotional energy as well as financial resources in rearing children who can not always appreciate their sacrifices though they view them more positively then the general public * Parents are rewarded with the joys of parenting in the areas they hoped for: closeness, affection, love of children, feeling of pleasure in helping child grow, satisfaction in their own progress as parents * Belsky points out how little society acknowledges what parents do - how might society make such as acknowledgment

Partners' Views of Each Other

* Parents love children and in one survey, over 96% say they are delighted to be parents, but they feel they are not doing as good a job as they should * Society agrees and often gives parents poor marks - believing they have children before they are ready and often spoil children * Children, however, believe parents are doing a good job

How Rearing Children Changes Parents

* Parents report many personal changes as a result of being a parent: becoming more mature, more understanding of others, more patient, more appreciative of parents' efforts, willing to work hard to be a good parent * Studies report parents are more observant, resilient, more socially skilled, more motivated and efficient * Parents also report taking better care of themselves physically, understanding own childhoods better, and having greater senses of the wonder of life

Transmitting Ways of Relating to Family Members

* Parents transmit their ways of rearing to children who adopt same positive or negative ways of interacting with their children * Grandchildren adopt same ways of relating to parents as parents did to grandparents

Culture provides a Developmental Niche that Prescribes:

* Physical and social settings for parents and children - - e.g., where children sleep, play * Psychological characteristics valued in parents and children * Recommended parenting practices and behaviors for family members

Effects of Poverty Status on Children

* Poor children are at higher risk for: - Physical health problems with higher risks of infant mortality, low birth weight, greater exposure to lead poisoning, toxic waste - Neighborhoods with poorer day care and schools, greater risk for violence and aggressive peers - Fewer toys, less verbal stimulation, less affection and attention

Interventions

* Preschool programs * Parenting Programs * Community programs like Better Beginnings Better Futures - in which communities decided how they wanted to spend money to provide services that paid for themselves by the time children were 15 * Increasing mothers' education and awareness so she can access community services so her children can have benefits of stimulation and cultivation through community programs

Protective Factors in Children's Lives

* Protective factors, defined as factors that lead to positive changes in children's functioning, were: - Positive atmosphere of family - mother felt positive about herself and children Mothers taught children to think, reflect, and make decisions - Children's feeling that world was predictable place and family had support - Children's self-esteem

Parents' Critical Roles in Children's Lives

* Providing a protective environment for growth * Stimulating optimal development * Advocating for children in wider environment like schools or medical care * Launching children on extended pathways of development * Establishing ways of relating to others that are passed on to the next generation

Society 's Lack of Acknowledgement of Parents' Efforts

* Psychologist Jay Belsky who followed families as they reared their children agrees with children, and he worries about the little recognition that parents receive for all their hard work and sacrifices. He wrote that the ills that plague the American family come from many sources, "But I think one major source is that our society no longer honors what I witnessed every day - - the quiet heroism of everyday parenting." * Acknowledgment might make it easier for parents to make such sacrifices

Parent's Behavior is Influenced by:

* Quality of the marital tie and support network * Personal qualities such as sociability, psychological stability * Past and present relationships with own parents * Extended family network, friends * Work setting and skills * Problem-solving skills

Race

* Race is considered a social construct rather than a biological category because there is much genetic variation within races, few biological differences between races, and because most of us carry markers of more than one race * Race is then a category people use to identify and justify social position * In Census about 2.4 percent self-identify as being of two or more races

Reasons for Not Having Children

* Restrictions - - loss of freedom, time * Negative feelings with respect to children - - worries about children, fear of disappointment, difficulties with discipline * Fears they will not provide good care

Risk Factors

* Risk factors, factors associated with poor outcomes for children, were: - Mothers' personal difficulties - - anxiety, lack of emotional stability, lower education and lack of occupational skills - Negative family atmosphere - - mothers' rigid beliefs about growth, few positive mother-child interactions - Added stresses of single parenthood, minority group status - Stressful events, especially when occurred in large family

Other Ways of Learning Culture

* Rituals and celebrations * Stories parents and children tell (see Chapter 5 page 146) * Conversations between parents and children from young ages (Chapter 8, see page 256) reflect important values - Taiwanese families use conversations to point out present and past mistakes so child learns how to behave, American families use conversations to build self-esteem, and mistakes are rarely mentioned) * Play with other children often leads to rehearsing roles important in the culture * Religious and spiritual activities convey group's most important values

Parents Protective Environment for Children's Growth

* Rochester Longitudinal Study followed children from birth to adolescence and related protective and risk factors to child's social and emotional functioning (only maternal qualities included because too few fathers were involved to consider as a group) * Arnold Sameroff et al., "Family and Social Influences on the Development of Child Competence," in Families, Risk, and Competence, eds. Michael Lewis and Candice Feiring (Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum, 1998), 161-185; and * Ronald Seifer et al., Child and Family Risk Factors That Ameliorate Risk between 4 and 13 Years of Age," Journal of the Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 31 (1992: 893-993)

Box 1-2 Illustrates How Friends Can Help When Family Has Few Resources and Society Gives Little Formal Help

* Ryan Green's mother was emotionally and financially stressed when he was a boy and had few resources to help him when he developed significant behavioral problems * Supportive school teachers went beyond their usual activities and served as consistent, caring figures who sought out stimulating experiences and resources for him * He developed dreams and aspirations that they supported * He achieved a dream few would have anticipated for him

Influence of Socioeconomic Status (SES) on Parenting

* SES based on occupation, education, and income that can change from time to time * When families have average incomes, income is less an influence on parenting beliefs and behavior than parents' education and occupational status * When income is low, at the poverty level, it has a greater impact on parents' behavior than any other variable, e.g., ethnic background

Positive Influences on Ethnic and Immigrant Groups' Experiences -

* Schools, though poor, can be great resources for children by providing a warm class climate, helping children learn and protecting them from discrimination and prejudice * Neighborhoods, though poor, can bring immigrant families together, support customs and family values * Children are often seen through the lens of deficits * Though children are overrepresented in groups having problems, most children are not having problems

RAISING CHILDREN CHANGES PARENTS WHO

become more observant, sensitive, efficient, resilient, and social skilled gain greater understanding of self and are motivated to correct bad habits feel a new sense of awe and wonder in the world

PARENTS OF DIFFERING SOCIOECONOMIC STATUS HAVE

different views of their roles, with higher-status parents being more child-centered in their approach and lower-status parents being more parent-centered in their approach different goals and strategies, with higher-status parents valuing verbal interactions with children, eliciting and understanding feelings, and negotiating differences, and lower-status parents valuing obedience and strict discipline for noncompliance similar forms of interactions with children but spend different amounts of time doing them

CHILDREN AROUND THE WORLD

learn cultural values and rules in similar kinds of activities like play, work, conversations, and lessons, though each culture may rely more on one activity than another have similar television habits are strongly influenced by the level of industrialization in the country which dictates amount of schooling and time spent away from family

THE PROCESS OF PARENTING INVOLVES

three partners: children, parents, and society children who have their own needs and temperaments but meet parents' and society's needs parents who rear their children while also maintaining marriages, work, and social relationships society defines roles, enforces basis requirements for parents, and serves as a powerful source or stress for children and parent

CULTURE PROVIDES

ways of viewing the world goals and strategies for parenting

Two-Factor Theory of Ethnic Group Identity

* William Cross described a system in which individuals form a sense of personal identity, (PI) their special qualities, self-esteem, self-confidence * Cross also believes individuals have a Reference Group Identity (RGO) that includes gender identity, ethnic identity, and that each person's RGO differs depending on experiences, interpretations - members of ethnic groups may have sense of ethnic identity but their RGO differs * RGO may be prominent in some groups and not in others, e.g., some European Americans may not have much sense of an ethnic identity but others strongly think of themselves as Irish Americans or Italian Americans and keep strong attachments to their European culture * RGO can change based on experiences, e.g., new experience of discrimination or helpfulness on part of others and reevaluate their RGO

REASONS FOR HAVING CHILDREN

* to love, affection, to be close to, and stimulation * creative outlet, proof of maturity, and sense of achievement * proof of virtue and economic advantage - joys that far outweigh problems of rearing children * Feeling a greater sense of self growth * To feel excitement at helping children grow, feelings of creativity and accomplishment * Meeting expectations of society, religion * Feel greater security in times of need, illness, old age

Values of Different Groups

* European Americans value individual achievement, vigorous expressions of strong opinions on part of all family members, working out solutions together * African American value closeness with extended family members and fictive kin who are friends described as auntie or uncle, have strong attachments to church activities, more directive and strict * Asian American families are close units with strong emphasis on hard work to improve and studying to achieve and honor family - conversational differences between Asian and Irish American families (page 256), in which Asian parents use conversations to point out mistakes, past and present, and ways to improve; conversations in Irish American families center more on children's positive traits and positive achievements * Latino/a families emphasize family closeness, loyalty and obligations, children are kept close to family and some most of their time in the presence of a family member * Contrast between Asian American and Puerto Rican American families in this country. Pages 331-333, show that Puerto Rican families emphasize keeping children close to parents whereas Asian American families encourage sending children out of area for better schools to achieve more education and work success

Actions Parents and Schools Can Take to Promote Fairness and Justice

* Exposing children from early ages to contact with peers of different ethnic backgrounds in joint activities in sports or in nursery and elementary schools * Expressing interest in customs of all ethnic groups, foods, histories, holidays, and histories of groups * Research suggests that when children learn of hardships of other groups, they have greater empathy and more positive feelings for those groups

Changes in Social Context over Two Centuries

* Extended farm family life was predominant form until late 1800s - all members were economic producers who worked and lived together with women raising chickens and selling eggs or other food products, men growing crops or animal products. * Nuclear family arose as industrialization and urbanization increased and families established basic unit of caring individuals with fathers being economic producers outside the home and mothers the loving caregivers inside the home - predominated until about the 1960s.

Parents' Twenty-First Century Challenges

* Fears regarding national safety and security. * Economic insecurity following the 2008 Recession and the loss of homes, jobs, income for many families. * Globalization has produced increased academic competition for school-aged children as children in many other countries outscore the US students at a time when our academic performance is slipping as witnessed by the drop in high school graduation rates. * Increasing presence of technology in family life - with parents never away from the job and everyone sitting in front of their own screen.

Fill Out Chart Suggested in Exercise Two

* Fill out the suggested graph in Exercise 2 at the end of the chapter to see the influences affecting students' parents and their upbringing - start 9 months before date of birth because extremely stressful event in life of parent can affect developing child. * Fill out for the class what the differences in historical changes might look like for someone becoming a parent now at age 22 and at 32. * Younger parent would have been 10 at the time of 9/11, and might have had great fears of terrorism or had a parent in National Guard or Army and spent , the rest of growing up worrying about welfare of parent (Chapter 17). * Chart the older parent's calmer youth and adolescence and the effects of the 2008 recession on parents of both ages.

What Do Parents Want from Society?

* Financial help, e.g., increasing tax exemption for children, tax credit for child care, eliminating taxes on essential child items such as diapers * Work and social changes to give parents more time with children - - e.g., tax incentives to encourage employers to permit job-sharing and flex time schedules, paid maternity and paternity leave time at birth and times of illness * Laws and benefits increasing children's safety - - health care, requiring safety devices on guns * Positive messages on TV and media that reinforce parents' values for children

National Patterns of Activities

* Finnish children learned more about culture from conversations and less from lessons * Russian children learned more from work, lessons, and conversation and less from play * South Korean children learned more from work and play and less from conversations * Kenyan children learned more from lessons and work and less from conversation * Brazilian children learned more from conversations but less from work and lessons * American and Estonian children had a balance of learning from all activities

Society Provides Parents and ChiIdren:

* Free public education for children from ages 5 to 18 * Specific tax emption for each child in family * Tax credit for child care expenses * Any other assistance is given only if parent or child has a disability or financial hardship * Benefits are small in contrast to those in other industrialized countries that provide health care for children , early childhood education, maternity and paternity leave for parents

Constructing Cultural Schema

* From all cultural influences, children actively construct a view of the world and their place in it; they do not passively absorb outside influences * Parents present expectations and rules, and children resist, e.g., resist going to bed, sleeping alone, but most often adapt to parents' requests * Culture, according to one anthropologist, is like a salad with many ingredients and people select, interpret, and use what fits them

Integrated Model of Ethnic and Immigrant Experiences

* Garcia Coll and Szalacha consider these 2 groups experience discrimination that leads to inadequate resources in neighborhoods with greater violence, poorer schools, fewer community resources * Give example, that even when both European Americans and African Americans are low income, African American children had more social risks with lower quality childcare, poorer schools - poorer schools related to lower grades * Illustrate how discrimination can affect every aspect of life with following example of sleep that in turn can affect health

Child Rearing in Independent Model

* Goal is to rear independent individual, able to make decisions * Learning is through verbal means of asking questions, listening to directions, negotiating, frequent praise for child * Child is encouraged to express opinions * Parents help grown children if they want to

Child-rearing in Interdependent Model

* Goal is to rear socially responsible person * Emphasis on learning through observation, participating in activities * Verbal messages are primarily given for directives, corrections, little praise Parents have obligations to help children even when grown

American Mothers

* Goals for children were: (1) to be emotionally and economically independent, (2) happy no matter what their economic status, and (3) honest and respectful with other people; mothers worried they were not providing proper stimulation for babies' development * Babies spend their time in one-on-one interactions with mother (about one- third of time observed) or alone in their rooms, sleeping or playing with toys * Though others came and went in home, mothers provided primary * When babies became mobile (about 10 months), mothers baby-proofed the house, taught babies basic safety rules, and babies crawled around on the floor exploring freely (about 50% of time observed) * Mothers felt good that babies were developing well because they were active and curious * American mothers worried about sleep habits and establishing healthy sleep patterns so babies got enough sleep * By four months, babies slept alone in own bed, often in own room * Mothers did not worry about eating and believed babies regulated own food needs * Babies ate on demand, often alone with mothers feeding babies. When older, children fed themselves

Comparison

* Goals of American and Italian mothers shaped their daily practices and their worries about their children * American mothers emphasized independence in play, exploration, sleeping, and eating * Italian mothers enveloped their infants in complex social interactions, which required adaptation on the part of babies and gave few opportunities for independence

Italian Mothers

* Goals of Italian mothers were: (1) good health, (2)financial security, and (3) good family life that included spouse and children; mothers did not worry about their adequacy as a parent because they believed babies turn out as they will * Babies were social - they had little direct interaction with mothers (about 10% of time) but were almost never alone, 2 or 3 people always around - in all but 1 family, at least one grandparent visited every day * Italian mothers believed free exploration was too dangerous so babies spent only 26% of time exploring - when they started to walk, someone held their hand; no Italian mother worried about baby's independence * Babies had no sleep routines and often dropped off to sleep in the midst of family activity - babies slept in parents' bedroom often till age 2 * Eating was much more important than sleeping - babies were required to eat on schedule and to come to family meals even if they had to be waked up to be there * Babies were expected to get used to eating rituals even if they did not like them because eating was an important social activity with the family

Classroom Programs Can Promote Justice

* In The Netherlands multicultural curriculum was designed to increase children's understanding of all groups * Program also taught reasons to eliminate discrimination expressed in name calling and exclusion from activities * Program emphasized the social and moral imperative of equal treatment for all children * Students later showed less bias

Additional Program

* In US, Teaching Tolerance program helps students become aware of discriminating behavior and ways to counteract it * Sesame Street has designed programs for preschoolers in the US and Europe, particularly in areas of conflict like Northern Ireland, teaching importance of inclusion, mutual respect for all groups

Advantages/Stresses of Each Model

* In interdependent model, individual has stress of restraining own thoughts and feelings, and accommodating behavior to meet others' needs but is secure that others will help in times of need * In the Independent model individual is free to have own wishes, pursue own goals but anxiety comes from fear of failure and lack of guaranteed help in times of need

Parent's Contribution to the Process

* In separate lecture, describe parent's importance to children * For society parent provides free, 24-hour care to meet all of children's needs and society has a very difficult time substituting for such care if parents are ineffective or absent

Ways to Adapt to New Culture

* Integration - features of old culture are combined with new * Separation - old culture is maintained as much as possible * Assimilation - new culture is adopted with abandonment of old culture * Marginalization - immigrants strongly pressured to give up old culture but hindered because of discrimination * Study of 5,000 immigrant youths found that the largest number fell in the integrated category, the second largest number in the separated category, the third largest, in the assimilated category

Variations in Culture

* Interdependent model is interpreted in slightly different ways in different cultures, in China pressures often come from authority figures, in Japan pressures may come from peers at work or at home * Differences in ways Independent model is interpreted. In The Netherlands, parents believe in importance of daily schedules and long hours of sleep; in US, more permissive, more irregular sleep; family time has different meanings in each country - in The Netherlands, it is spent with the whole family together in activities, in U.S., it is often one parent with one child

Two Main Cultural Models

* Interdependent/collectivist model developing from early hunter/gatherer societies - widely practiced in Asia, sub-Saharan Africa and South America; is older model, more widely used * Independent model developed from Greek civilization that puts primary emphasis on the individual and individual agency - widely practiced in Europe, North America, Australia and New Zealand

Parenting Is a Process because:

* It is a series of actions and interactions between parent and child * Each partner influences the other * Each partner changes in response to the actions of the other * In addition to the parent and child, there is a third partner (society or the social context that provides the social milieu in which children and parents live)

Ways of Summarizing SES Differences

* Lareau says middle class families believe in "concerned cultivation" to fully develop children's skills and see childhood as a time to work to prepare for an easier adulthood * Working class families believe in "accomplishing natural growth", letting children grow without pressures because they see childhood as the easy time and adulthood as the time of struggle * Allison Pugh says upper-income parents practice "symbolic deprivation", not giving children all they want because they do not want them to be materialistic * She sees low-income families practicing "symbolic indulgence," giving special clothes or gift when money available because most of the time, there is so little

Sleep Is Influenced by Ethnic Background

* Members of ethnic minority groups have fewer hours of sleep per night than European Americans * European Americans get more and better quality sleep than members of ethnic minority groups - Chicago study found European Americans got 7.4 hours per night, Asian Americans and Latinos, 6.9, and African Americans, 6.8, and these findings are consistent with other work * Even when education, income, and employment are controlled, race differences in sleep persist * Question is why? Suspicion falls on the stress that many members of ethnic groups experience with cortisol production interfering with smooth transitions to sleep * Sleep researchers have found that when people believe they have control of their lives, they sleep well and are rested in the morning * Many members of ethnic groups do not have this feeling: One African American man who was educated, employed, and a poor sleeper said, "As a black person in America, even if you succeed in terms of education, you still have to deal with the inherent inequality of society. I don't blame it on the majority - that's just simplistic. But in general it's not a fair thing and you stress because of that." That quote illustrates the thesis of The Spirit Level: Why Equality Is Better for Everyone, discussed in Chapter 1

Middle Class Parents

* More child-centered in approach, talk to children, listen to feelings, give choices, engage them in solving joint problems * Use more words and more positive words - young child in professional family hears positive statement about his behavior or questions, 30 times an hour, and prohibitions about 5 times an hour * Demand much of children's time in terms of activities that are designed to develop skills * Teach children to approach other adults in self-assertive way so children feel confident outside home and family

Working Class Parents

* More parent centered, see selves as authorities, more likely to give directives, less interested in child's feelings or input * More likely to be harsh and punitive when child does not comply * Less language directed at children and more critical in comments but still, less so than parents living in poverty * Have less confidence in dealing with school officials and outside professional people, and their children often share parents' uneasiness with authority figures * Place fewer constraints on leisure activities so children are freer to play with friends

Influence of Very Low Income and Poverty Status

* More than any other variable, low income impacts parenting and children's behavior * Of 124 parenting behaviors assessed in home with parents and children, 88 percent were affected by poverty status and only 15 items were unaffected - effects the same across all ethnic groups

Organizations and Agencies that Promote Parents' and Children's Well-Being

* More than ever people are establishing private organizations and groups to promote children's and parents' well-being. * Groups to support focused interests of parents like parks, new playgrounds, more recess time in school. * Groups like the Search Institute that help communities and parents work together to better provide for needs of parents and children.

Accumulation of Risks Led to Poor Outcome

* No one single risk factor led to difficulty, it was the number * Children in protected environment with no risk factors scored 30 points higher on IQ test than children with 8 or more risk factors * Protective and risk factors expanded or limited children's potential * No one change to make to eliminate risks; it is the combination of all the risks that drain * In another study*, physical (e.g., substandard housing, noise) and psychosocial (e.g. family turmoil, violence) risks in childhood were related to physical changes in adolescence in endocrine functioning, cortisol, and fat deposits when mothers were low in responsiveness. * Protective factor was highly sensitive and responsive mothering that served as a buffer against the physiological effects of stress so their children were healthy. *Gary Evans et al., "Cumulative Risk, Maternal Responsiveness, and Allostatic Load among Young Adolescents," Developmental Psychology 43 (2007): 341-351.

Bioecological theory says children require:

* Ongoing relationship with at least one adult who has a profound love for the child and a lifetime commitment to provide care * A second adult who joins in the emotional attachment to the child and supports the other parent in caregiving activity * Stable and consistent interactions with caregivers and objects in the environment to develop understanding of the world * Child need not be biologically related to parent or live in a two-parent family but caregivers must have lifelong commitment to child

Society Has a Greater Focus on Supporting Children's Positive Growth

* Organizations like Search Institute focus on children's optimal development, not just avoiding problems but developing to the fullest - doing this often reduces risk behaviors like substance abuse, delinquency in the process. * More venues through the Internet and organizations to get enrichment for children. * Review Box 1-2 in which it was a combination of great personal interest on the part of teachers as well as an enriched state high school program that enabled Ryan Green to attain a dream his family could not help him achieve but was achieved with the support of members of the larger community.

The Role of the Parent

* Parent is most important, though not only, influence and provides: - Material resources and physical care - Psychological, emotional care - Stimulation for growth through activities and interactions - Advocate for child's interests in larger community

Definition of Parenting:

* Parenting is nourishing, protecting, guiding new life from birth to maturity * Parents provide: - Ongoing secure positive attachment to children - Physical resources (home & food) - Teaching, guidance, and stimulation to promote growth - Serve as advocates for children in broader community

Everyday Activities around the World That Teach Children Cultural Values

* Parents care for babies in many different ways, but all contain necessary elements so babies around the world become attached to parents, walk at about the same age, develop language at about the same age * One- to three-year-old children in rural Canada, rural Peru and rural India develop similar social-cognitive skills, attending to and understanding others' intentions, imitating what they do, helping others * Differences in children in these three cultures begin to appear in the third year when Canadian children who have had books and engaged in pretend play are more skilled with pictures of objects and using objects for pretend play than age-mates in Peru or India * Children in Peru and India gain these kills a year later so it is thought culturally specific skills with abstract symbols and use of objects depend more on specific learning experiences

Effect of Single Historical Event

* Single dramatic event like drought, flood, or shooting can affect community, families, parents and their parenting tasks as well as children for decades. * Max Taves and Joel Millman (Wall St. Journal, A 4, July 25, 2012) describe crisis managers' descriptions of long-lasting impact of horrific event on families and communities, looking at the effects of the 1999 Columbine High school shooting near Littleton, Co. the community of 42,000 identified with the killing though the high school was not in the town. These changes affected parents and children not involved. * While school staff often stay a year or two after a shooting, many transfers and Columbine High School lost 59% of staff between 1999-2002. * Currently only 17% of staff at the time of the shooting are still there when generally teacher turns over is 3-5% a year. * Staff and students feel schools are safe but the school still receives almost yearly threats of a bombing and students are evacuated. One student graduating this year feels he can never really get away from the effects of the event. * Staff often experience physical symptoms from stress for years. * Economic costs for the community are great as well - in Colorado, processing documents for media and citizens wanting information cost millions of dollars - West Virginia Tech spent over a million to process documents for the chronology of events and several million to add security forces. * Experts agree that traumatic events can bring communities together, sparking conversation, closeness, and generosity. * In whatever way a community responds, one traumatic event can have a strong impact on children and families for an extended time as we also see in Chapter 17 when discussing Hurricane Katrina.

Social Class Differences in Activities of Children in Other Countries

* Social class differences similar to those in US * Children in middle class have more lessons, more pretend play, more work, and in 4 countries, less TV time than working class children

Transmission of Culture

* Socialization is the process through which children acquire beliefs, values, skills, attitudes, ways of thinking of their culture * Melvin Konner identified 4 general ways to transmit culture - Cultural habituation - - living the culture - Learning through social interactions with people who explain culture, give instructions what to do - Emotional enculturation -- identifying with the actions of loved ones and copying them - Cognitive enculturation -- learning ways of perceiving from language, stories, narratives that shape how we think

Society's Expectations

* Society has expectations that are less obligatory than laws but still are powerful shapers of what parents do. * Sometimes expectations are reasonable, e.g., insisting that parents see children get exercise. * Sometimes expectations are unreasonable for both men and women as Judith Warner and Joe Ehrmann describe in Box 1-1. An example of an expectation that is currently being challenged is that mothers breastfeed babies for a year - - many women are saying this is too demanding given the requirements of work and work settings for expressing milk and they do not want to feel guilty.

Society's Role in the Process

* Society provides broad guidelines for parents' and children's behaviors * Society gives legal status to parent - must have a birth certificate or legal adoption paper * Parent has to provide medical care, access to education, responsible, non- injurious discipline * Child is expected to obey parent's reasonable rules and requires parent's permission for most activities prior to age 18 though a child may have access to substance abuse, reproductive health care and psychiatric care without permission

Society's Expectations of Parents

* Society's expectations of parents can be realistic, such as that of providing care and appropriate discipline * Can be unrealistic as examples in Box 1-1 show where demand of women and men, are difficult, if not impossible, to meet * May be so minimal at present that David Lykken sees a need for a parenting license to insure that parents are more prepared to play their crucial role in children's lives

Middle-Class and Working Families Share Many Qualities

* Spend enormous time caring for children * Times of fun, laughter, happiness * Satisfying family rituals * Large percentage of time spent in routine activities * Atmosphere of safety and security * Different temperaments among family members * Unexpected tragedies

Positive Strengths of Families

* Strong sense of ethnic pride * Strong sense of family obligation * High family cohesion

Ethnic Groups in the United States

* Table 2-2 gives demographic information on major ethnic groups in this country * European Americans most likely to follow an independent model of child rearing, but many subgroups have a more interdependent orientation * Many ethnic groups have a more interdependent focus as well with a more hierarchical relationship between parents and children - parents are more controlling with children, insisting on obedience

Twenty-First Century Supports for Parents

* Technology: - Enables parents to stay in touch with children, their teachers and coaches, to know where children are and make changes in plans easily. - Connects parents to up-to-date information and to organizations that can help parents accomplish their goals. - Can stay connected to psychologically important people we do not see that often.

Sleep Is Influenced by Ethnic Background

* There are other factors as well - poorer communities and neighborhoods have more noise, making it harder to sleep; African American and Latino/a children less likely to have regular bedtime with relaxing reading routine prior to bed, but even when these factors are controlled ethnicity plays a role * Douglas Quenqua, "How Well You Sleep May Hinge on Race," New York Times, August 21, 2012, D1.

Parents Are Most Successful in Avoiding Parents' Negative Behaviors When

* They have the emotional support of friend, spouse, or therapist * They attend parenting programs * They live in the present moment with their children, appreciating how they are thinking and feeling * They make conscious choices to do things differently and carry out parenting behaviors they desire

Economic Inequality Affects Everyone

* Unequal countries have higher rates of physical illness, shorter life spans, more mental health and substance abuse problems, more teen pregnancies, higher crime rates and more violence. * Inequality affects everyone in the society as the highest status person in an unequal country has a shorter life span than the lowest status person in a country with equal spread of income. * Epidemiologists speculate we are all social creatures, very aware of social status, and when status differences are very marked, people feel insecure and stressed and stress hormones undermine health; in equal societies people feel more secure and trust others will support them if needed.

Chapter 2

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Learning Objectives:

1. Identify the roles of child, parent, and society in the parenting process. 2. Assess the challenges of raising children in the 21st century. 3. Evaluate how the broader social context impacts parenting. 4. Illustrate the crucial role of parents in launching children on developmental pathways.

Learning Objectives

Compare how the independent/interdependent cultural models influence the parent/child relationship. Examine the major sources of cultural influences within the U.S. Interpret the integrative model of child development on the experiences of immigrant and ethnic minority children. Determine the commonalities and differences in child-rearing practices that are influenced by SES.

POOR CHILDREN

are more likely to suffer health problems, cognitive delays, abuse, and neglect than are nonpoor children lack income that affects the quality of their health care, home environment and neighborhoods tend to experience conflict and tension because their parents face stress from financial pressure

WHEN PARENTS HAVE DIFFICULT EXPERIENCES WITH THEIR PARENTS IN CHILDHOOD, THEY

are not doomed to repeat them with their children can gain self-understanding and reparent themselves as well as get guidance from professionals, parenting groups, and friends

PARENT EDUCATORS BENEFIT FROM

exploring their own values about parenting programs that help them to pay attention to parents' goals and preferred strategies

THE SOCIAL CONTEXT OF PARENTING

has shifted from extended farm family in the nineteenth century to nuclear families for much of the twentieth century to diverse faterm-23milies in the 1970s and more recently a sift to multigenerational families is very diverse in terms of parents' living arrangements, racial and ethnic background, and economic resources presents twenty-first century challenges of national and economic insecurity and increase in technology at home, but also provides special supports has not weakened bonds of solidarity between the generations

MEMBERS OF ETHNIC AND IMMIGRANT GROUPS IN THIS COUNTRY

have often experienced prejudice and rejection differ in values and strategies of parenting, with European Americans preferring the independent model and many other groups preferring the interdependent model differ in levels of self-esteem, with members of individualistic cultures reporting higher global self-esteem and members of interdependent cultures reporting lower global self-esteem report higher self-esteem when they feel supported and appreciated by their community

PARENTING IS

nourishing, protecting, and guiding new life providing resources to meet children's needs for love, attention and values

EVEN THOUGH NATIONAL CULTURES ARE DYNAMIC AND CHANGING AND HAVE THEIR OWN PARTICULAR EMPHASIS, CULTURES AROUND THE WORLD HAVE BEEN CATEGORIZED INTO TWO MAIN MODELS OF SOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS

the independent model, stressing children's independence, initiative, and the capacity for setting and achieving goals the interdependent model, stressing children's becoming part of a strong social network that nourishes and supports them

PARENTS ARE

the single most important influence and resource in a child's life not the only influences on children's behaviors, as media, communities, and social events outside the family influence children's behavior and development as well stimulators and providers of nourishing environments that enable children to achieve their maximal potential even when genetic factors make special efforts necessary advocates who can make social changes to help children so influential that some suggest people be required to have a license to become parents difficult for stat institutions to replace