FAD2230 CH 5

Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs Theory

!. Physiological needs 2. Safety and security needs. 3. Love and belonging 4. Self-esteem needs 5. Self-actualization needs

Romantic love and marriage were often not attached to each other. -______ __________, during the Middle Ages, there were some precursors to our notion of romantic love in marriage. (e.g chivalry)

12th century

Romantic love and marriage were often not attached to each other. -______ ______ and _______ _________ did not associate love with marriage.

Ancient Greek and Roman mythology

Theoretical Perspectives on Love -Theories that suggest humans are attracted to certain types of people, at which point the brain releases natural chemicals that give us a rush we experience as sexual attraction.

Biochemical Perspectives of Love

Triangular Theory of Love -_______ ___________ has three elements: intimacy, passion, and commitment

Consummate love

Pool of eligibles: the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates. From there, we "filter" down by: -_____________: dating/marrying within one's specific cultural group, such as ethnicity, social class, or religion. Focused on one core characteristic for getting married in the group

Endogamy

Pool of eligibles: the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates. From there, we "filter" down by: -___________: dating/marrying outside of one's specific cultural group, such as ethnicity, social class, or religion. Focused on one core characteristic for getting married outside the group

Exogamy

The process beginning in the 19th century in which love became associated with the private work of women in the home, namely, nurturing and caring for family members.

Feminization of Love

Pool of eligibles: the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates. From there, we "filter" down by: -____________: partners do not share certain social characteristics such as race, age, ethnicity, religion, education, and social class. Many characteristics

Heterogamy

Pool of eligibles: the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates. From there, we "filter" down by: -____________: partners share certain social characteristics such as race, age, ethnicity, religion, education, and social class. Many characteristics

Homogamy

-arise from feelings of self-doubt, unworthiness, and inadequacy; may stem from hurts the past. --These needs are insatiable.

Illegitimate needs/deficiency needs

-needs that arise in the present rather than out of deficits accumulated in the past. --Emotional support, understanding, companionship, sexual sharing.

Legitimate needs/being needs

very intense emotions experienced during the early formation of attachment to an individual.

Limerence

seeking to control the feeling attitudes and behavior of your partners.

Manipulating

maintaining a relationship by consistently ignoring ones own legitimate needs; while trying to satisfy all of the partners needs (legitimate and illegitimately).

Martyring

the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates.

Pool of eligibles

Pool of eligibles: the pool of people from which we are able to choose mates. From there, we "filter" down by: -____________: geographic closeness.

Propinquity

A developmental theory that shows relationships moving from the establishment of rapport, to self-revelation, mutual dependency, and finally, need personality need fulfillment. Once you get the process of love started, it is a continuous process

Reiss's Wheel Theory of Love

the three components of consummate love develops at different times as love grows and changes. ________ is the quickest to develop, and the quickest to fade, ________ develops more slowly, and ___________ more gradually still.

passion intimacy commitment

satisfy a majority of each others emotional needs.

personality need fulfillment

food, water, warmth, rest

physiological needs

________ is the root word for pragmatic. this love emphasizes the practical element in human relationships and rational assessment of a potential partner's assets and liabilities. arranged marriages are often examples of this love, as is a person who decides rationally to get married to a suitable partner.

pragma

practical, sensible (e.g. we make sense to each other or compliment each other, out of the mind rather than the heart)

pragma

men also fall in love more ________ than women

quickly

building relationship based on mutual trust and respect.

rapport

A type of love that is characterized by passion, melodrama, and excitement, and which receives a lot of media attention.

romantic love

intimacy and passion

romantic love

security, saftey

safety needs

applying attachment theory to loving relationships, we can presume that people with more ________ attachment styles would have less ambivalence about emotional closeness and commitment.

secure

we might conclude that those with a _______ attachment style have stronger interpersonal skills and are better prospects for a committed relationship

secure

achieving one's full potential, including creative activities

self-actualisation

sharing intimate information about oneself.

self-revalation

John Alan Lee classified _____ love styles, initially based on interviews with 120 white, heterosexual respondents of both genders.

six

Theoretical Perspectives on Love -An evolutionary theory that all humans have an instinctive impulse to pass on their genetic material.

sociobiology

robert sternberg's theory that consummate love involves three components: intimacy, passion, and commitment

sternberg's triangle theory of love

________ is an affectionate, companionate style of loving. this love style focuses on deepening mutual commitment, respect, friendship over time, and common goals. the basic attitudes these loves have to their partner is that of familiarity.

storge

companionate, mutual love, respect (friendship love)

storge

psychologist found ______ to be more important in marriages with children and _______ did not necessarily diminish relationship satisfaction among those who are mutually uncommited.

storge ludus

the marriage of people from two different countries

transnational marriage

love-and the need for love-is generally thought to be the domain of ___________

women

intimacy, passion, commitment

consummate love

a sum of money or property the female brings to the marriage in the form of cash, jewelry, furniture, electronics, and other household items.

dowry

Romantic love and marriage were often not attached to each other. -_______ __________ did not associate love with marriage.

early christianity

Sternberg proposed ________ types of love based on the combination of passion, intimacy and commitment.

eight

commitment only

empty love

Passionate, strong physical attraction

eros

________ is the roman figure cupid

eros

_________ is a greek word meaning "love;" it forms the root of our word erotic. this love style is characterized by intense emotional attachment and powerful sexual feelings or desires. sustained relationships established by erotic couples are characterized by continued and emotionally intense sexual interest.

eros

psychologists found that __________ can last throughout marriage and relates to high satisfaction and _______ is also positively associated with relationship satisfaction.

eros agape

Lee's Styles of Love -__________ -__________ -__________ -__________ -___________ -___________

eros storge pragma ludus agape mania

prestige, feeling of accomplishment

esteem needs

passion and commitment

fatuous love

culture or society in which individuals choose their own marriage partners, a choice usually based at least somewhat on partners' love for one another

free-choice culture

the idea that heterosexuality is the only normal, acceptable, or "real" marriage option, starts in preschool

heteronormative bias

western culture's definition of love reflects a _________ ________, which means love is thought about as something that can only occur between opposite sex partners

heteronormative bias

Feminization of Love -_______ _________: men go to work and experience the stresses of labor outside the home.

industrial revolution

only passion

infatuated love

an ___________ attachment style entails "fear of abandonment" with consequent possible negative behaviors such as unwarranted jealousy or attempts to control one's partner

insecure/anxious

According to sternberg's triangle theory of love, _________ "refers to close, connected, and feelings in a loving relationship it includes feelings that create the experience of warmth in a loving relationship such as experiencing happiness with the loved one; sharing ones self and one's possessions with the loved one; receiving and giving emotional support to the loved one; and having intimate communication with the loved one.

intimacy

Triangular Theory of Love - closeness and sharing.

intimacy

___________, which includes conveying and understanding each other's needs, listening to and supporting each other, and sharing common values, becomes increasingly important as time goes on

intimacy

Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love -____________ -____________ -_____________

intimacy passion commitment

Psychologist Robert Sternberg found three components necessary to authentic love: _________, __________, and ___________.

intimacy, passion, and commitment

intimacy alone

liking

a typically involuntary state of being infatuated or obsessed with someone, characterized by a strong desire for one's feelings to be returned. this is generally not primarily for a sexual relationship

limerance

A strong affection for one another arising out of kinship or personal ties; attraction based on sexual desire; and affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests.

love

_____ _____ are sets of distinctive characteristics that loving or lovelike relationships take

love styles

________ focuses on love as play or fun. it emphasizes the recreational aspects of sexuality and enjoying many sexual partners rather than searching for one serious relationship. of course, flirtation and playful sexuality may be part of a more committed relationship based on one of the other love styles.

ludus

playful, carefree, casual (e.g. limerence, summer vacay type of love)

ludus

________, a greek word, designates a wild or violent mental disorder, an obsession, or a craze. it involves strong sexual attraction and emotional intensity, as does eros. However, it differs from eros in that these partners are extremely jealous and moody, and their need for attention and affection is insatiable. these lovers alternate between euphoria and depression. the slightest lack of response from a love partner causes anxiety and resentment.

mania

obsessive, possessive, intense

mania

seeking to control the feelings, attitudes, and behavior of one's partner or partners in underhanded ways rather than by assertively stating one's case.

manipulating

the sociological concept that potential mates take stock of their personal and social characteristics and then comparison shop or bargain for the best buy (mate) they can get

marriage market.

______ involves maintaining relationships by consistently minimizing one's own needs while trying to satisfy those of one's partner.

martyring

doing all one can for others while ignoring one's own legitimate needs. people who do it often punish the person and tell them "just how much I put up with"

martyring

desire to spend more time together.

mutual dependency

no intimacy, passion, or commitment

nonlove

_________ is known to be the bonding or attachment hormone

oxytocin

Triangular Theory of Love -intense physical and emotional drive

passion

________ "refers to the drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, sexual consummation, and the like in a loving relationship."

passion

________ comes very quickly, but it is also the first to fade

passion

________, or "chemistry", peaks early in the relationship but generally continues at a stable, although fluctuating level and remains important both to our good health

passion

an ________ attachment style leads one to pass up or shun closeness and intimacy by evading relationships, demonstrating ambivalence, seeming preoccupied or, among men, rejecting romance and expressing hostile attitudes toward women.

avoidant

intimate relationships, friends

belongingness and love needs

money or property that the groom pays the future bride's family so that he can marry her.

bride-price

Feminization of Love -The home becomes a "haven of rest" for men, and women become the keepers of it. Thus, _______ and _______________ begin to become evidence of love.

caregiving and domesticity

Triangular Theory of Love -decision to be in and work at a relationship.

commitment

________ may take longer to form, but once it comes it is the glue that holds the relationship together and doesn't fade

commitment

___________ is essential; however, ________ without intimacy, and some level of passion, is hollow.

commitment

____________- the "decision/commitment component of love" - consists of not only deciding to love someone but also deciding to maintain that love.

commitment

more so than intimacy and passion, _________ is associated with reproductive success.

commitment

willingness to work through problems and conflicts as opposed to calling it quits when problems arise

commitment

A type of love that grows over time, based on strong commitment, friendship, and trust.

companionate love

intimacy and commitment

companionate love

unions in which parents choose their children's marriage partners

arranged marriage

today it is more common for children to marry only when they themselves accept their parents' choice. unions like these, sometimes called _______ or _____________, can be found among some muslim groups and other recent immigrants to the united states

assisted or semi-arranged marriages

a complete love, in terms of Sternberg's triangular theory of love, in which the components of passion, intimacy, and commitment come together

consummate love

loving involves the __________ of partners for themselves and "not for their ability to change themselves or to meet another's requirements to play a role." Related to this is having ________ toward one's partner, which includes understanding them from their frame of reference rather than one's own.

acceptance empathy

________ is a greek word meaning "love feast." this love emphasizes unselfish concern for a beloved's needs even when that requires personal sacrifice. sometimes called altruistic love or compassionate love, it emphasizes nurturing others with a little conscious desire for a return other than the intrinsic satisfaction of having loved and cared for someone else.

agape

altruistic, kind, patient (type of love used to describe how God loves his people, never ending)

agape